Jokes so funny, you won’t stop sharing them 08

1.

Funny Jokes

A store manager Bob stopped by a small manufacturing plantA store manager Bob stopped by a small manufacturing plant he spotted during his last trip through a part of the countryside in the hopes of gaining another client in the area.However, little did B



2.

Funny Jokes

A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house.
“Talking Dog For Sale”
He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.
The guy goes into the back



3.

Funny Jokes

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club.A mobile phone on a bench rings and a man picks up with the speakerphone on and begins to talk.Everyone else in the room stops talking:MAN: “Hello?”WOMAN: “Hi Honey, it's meAre you at the club?”MAN: “Yes.”



4.

Funny Jokes

Three women were sitting around throwing back a few drinks and talking about their love lives.One woman said, “I call my husband the dentistNobody can drill like he does.”The second woman giggled and confessed, “I call my husband the miner because of his



5.

Funny Jokes

3 men are playing golf at a Country Club: Obi Wan Kenobi, Darth Maul and a very old man.
Obi Wan tees off and hits his ball in the sand trap. He mind controls his caddy to mark it a hole-in-one.
Next Darth Maul hits his ball and it lands in the roug



6.

Funny Jokes

Wife's Diary:Tonight, I thought Tom was acting weirdWe had made plans to meet at a nice restaurant for dinnerI was shopping with my friends all day long; and I was a little late for our date.Conversation wasn't flowing, so I thought he was upset at the fa



7.

Funny Jokes

Scottish couple wants their kids to visit on Christmas EveHowever, there are some methods that make things easier…A man in Scotland calls his son in London the day before Christmas Eve and says, “I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your m



8.

Funny Jokes

A little girl asked her mother, “How did the human race appear?”
The mother answered, “God made Adam and Eve and they had children, and so was all mankind made..”
Two days later the girl asked her father the same question..
The father answered, “



9.

Funny Jokes

This dog walks into a post office and says to the Postmaster.
“I need to send a telegram.”
The Postmaster says.
“OK, what is it?”
The dog says.
“I need it to say, Woof woof woof woof woof woof woof.”
The Postmaster counts the words and s



10.

Funny Jokes

A very poor man lived with his wife whose hair was very long.One day the wife asked her husband to buy her a comb for her long hair so that it can continue to grow well and to be well groomed.The man felt sorry and said he didn't have money even to fix th



11.

Funny Jokes

In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the Mystic delivered the grave news:“There's no easy way to tell you this, so I'll just be blunt.Prepare yourself to be a widowYour husband will die a violent and horrible death this year.”Visibly shak



12.

Funny Jokes

After going through the line at a crowded mall cafeteria,The three rambunctious teenage boys found they were forced to share a table with a kindly looking old lady.One of the lads decided to have a bit of fun at the woman's expense and, nudging one of his



13.

Funny Jokes

A woman runs into a doctor's office and says,“Doctor! You have to help me! Everywhere I touch on my body it hurts!”The doctor replies, “Show me.”So the woman pokes her ankle and screams in pain.She pokes her knee and yells again.She pokes her forehead and



14.

Funny Jokes

After a long, dry sermon, the minister announced that he wished to meet with the church's board following the close of the service.The first man to arrive and greet the minister was a total stranger.“You misunderstood my announcementThis is a meeting of t



15.

Funny Jokes

I walked into a coffee shop on Halloween to find the woman behind the counterwith a bunch of sponges pinned to her uniform.“I'm assuming this is a costume, but just what are you supposed to be?” I asked.The waitress responded proudly, “I'm self-absorbed



16.

Funny Jokes

A businessman was in big troubleHe had put everything into his business, and now it was failing.It was so bad he was even contemplating suicideAs a last resort he went to a priest and poured out his story of tears and woe.When he had finished, the priest



17.

Funny Jokes

Two old women are walking down the street smoking, when it begins to rain.The first woman takes out a condom from her handbag, cuts off the tip and puts it over her cigarette.The second woman asked her what it was and the first woman said, “It's a condomY



18.

Funny Jokes

A poor slave, ill-treated by his master, runs away to the forest.
There he comes across a lion in pain because of a thorn in his paw.
The slave bravely goes forward and removes the thorn gently.
The lion without hurting him goes away.
Some day



19.

Funny Jokes

A woman walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer.
She says she’s going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.
The bank officer tells her that the bank will need some kind of security for such a loan,



20.

Funny Jokes

The young wife went into labor while her husband was overseas serving in the war.The next day he got the news that his wife had delivered twins.He got to a phone and called her right away.“Oh honey, I'm so happy,” he said“Who took you to the hospital?”“Yo



21.

Funny Jokes

The friendly usher at the country church greeted the elderly woman visitor at the door and helped her up the steps.“Where would you like to sit?” he asked politely.“The front row, please,” she answered.“You really don't want to do that,” the usher said“Th



22.

Funny Jokes

A woman was walking down the street when she was accosted by a homeless woman who asked her for a couple of dollars for dinner:The woman took out her wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked“If I give you this money, will you buy some wine with it instead



23.

Funny Jokes

Having arrived at the edge of the river, the fisherman soon realized he had forgotten to bring any bait.
Just then he happened to see a little snake passing by who had caught a worm.
The fisherman snatched up the snake and robbed him of his worm.



24.

Funny Jokes

The woman seductively signalled that he should bring his face closer to hersShe gestured alluringly to the bartender who approached her immediately.The woman seductively signalled that he should bring his face closer to hers.  As he did, she gently caress



25.

Funny Jokes

A woman was enjoying a good game of golf with her girlfriends.“Oh, no!” she suddenly exclaimed“Look at the time! I have to rush home and fix dinner for my husbandHe'll be so annoyed if it's not ready on time.”When she got home, she opened a can of cat foo



26.

Funny Jokes

One day a horse trader, a foreigner, came to the court of Krishnadeva Raya and told him he had some fine horses for sale.The emperor offered to buy them.The man took an advance of 5000 gold coins and promising to return with the horses in two days, went a



27.

Funny Jokes

A rather old fashioned lady, always quite delicate and elegant, especially in her language, was planning a weeks holiday in Sydney with her husband, so she wrote to a particular camping ground and asked for a reservation.She wanted to make sure that the c



28.

Funny Jokes

There was a party in the woods and, all of a sudden there was a downpour of rain.Two young men ran for about 10 minutes in the pouring rain and finally reached their car just as the rain let up They jumped in, started it up and headed down the road, laugh



29.

Funny Jokes

The King knew his gorgeous Queen was going to be unfaithful with everyone through the court and county, so he turned to his court magistrate for help.The court magistrate showed the King a pair of metal panties, with a hole in the middle.“Why, doesn't tha



30.

Funny Jokes

A rich man comes home and immediately starts shouting at his wife.
“I’ve been looking at our expenses and they are through the roof! What have you got so much to spend on? From now on, things will need to be different!” “Different how?” the wife asked.



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